06 March 2012

Guillen Hangs Em Up

Well this is The Coalition's second number hanging in the rafters (The Worm being the first). Carlos Guillen decided to call it quits today, retiring as a member of the Seattle Mariners. Sure the guy wasn't a spectacular player, but lets give credit where credit's due here. My man was always one of my favorite Tigers. That's a fact! This guy was just dripping Swagu. From the golf ball-sized wad of dip he had in at any given time (even on the streets on off nights) to the more recent Jered Weaver shot; who wouldn't love this guy? Sure, his last few seasons were plagued with injury after injury, but when he came back he had a flair that many other players on the team didn't have. Most notably Ryan Rayburn. God I hate Rayburn.

I digress.

Guillen was the last Tiger to hit for the cycle, and the first to do so in God knows how long (free shot of minz to the first person who can give me an accurate stat here). Do you know how hard it is to hit for the fucking cycle? Real hard, yeah! Well on behalf of the bros here at the Coalition, I'm gonna hang that big number 9 up from our virtual rafters and give it a Stone Cold Steve Austin style salute. Slamming 2 diesels and throwin in a pinch of Cope. Here's to you Carlos


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